Birthday speeches

Quotes, Jokes & Ideas for a Birthday Speech

We have had a lot of requests in the past few months for some one liners for birthday speeches. We have a number of threads on the discussion forum that contain information that would help you to put together your birthday speech. Also here are a few one liners you could use.

One liners

Speech-making is a bit like prospecting for black gold. If you don’t strike oil in 10 minutes, stop boring.

I’m told that the best speech makers follow three simple rules. Stand Up. Speak Up. Then, very quickly, Shut Up. I’ll try to stick to that advice.

The brain is a wonderful thing. It never stops functioning from the time you’re born until the moment you stand up to make a speech. – Herbert V Prochnow and Herbert V Prochnow Jnr

May you live all the days of your life – Jonathan Swift

Birthday Jokes

Artificial intelligence is a wonderful thing.
I told my computer that today is my birthday,
and it said that I needed an upgrade.

The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.

A true friend remembers your birthday but not your age.

“I guess I didn’t get my birthday wish.”
“How do you know?”
“You’re still here!”

Will you come to my party on Saturday? Yes, please, What’s the address? 25 The High Street. Just push the bell with your elbow. Why with my elbow? Well, you won’t be empty-handed, will you!

Age jokes

I am not young enough to know everything – JM Barrie

I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap. – Bob Hope

Example speeches
We also have a couple of birthday speech examples –
18th/ 21st Birthday Speech Example 1
Example of 18th/ 21st Birthday Speech
Birthday speech by a parent

There are also some free Birthday PowerPoint Templates and our birthday card maker as well as some advice on Dealing with nerves.


Published On: 7th Apr 2009

Read more about -
Speaking Articles,Speeches , ,

  1. Not really what I needed, but nice!

    Emma 30 Sep at 11:14 pm
  2. cute jokes…

    mimii 15 Jun at 10:07 am
  3. First of all I would just like to say Thank you mum and dad for organizing this party and I don’t think that anyone could have done it better and Thank you all for coming and I hope you have a great time.
    Secondly I’m told that the best speechmakers follow three simple rules. Stand Up. Speak Up. Then, very quickly, Shut Up. I’ll try to stick to that advice.
    It feels like i’ve been alive for ages but i’ve got to keep reminding myself that i’m only 13 and there’s many years to come but I’m so glad I’ve got to spend these 13 years with the people I love my family and friends.
    Now about a month ago I was looking through some great life statements and I’d like to share some
    . Life is not fair but its still good
    . When in doubt just take the next small step
    . Life is to short enjoy it
    . Make peace with your past so it doesn’t screw up your present
    . Over prepare then go with the flow
    . No matters how you feel get up dress up and show up

    jackson 17 Jun at 5:26 am
  4. i have a birthday party and i thank u for your support by posting this bd speech it has really helped me….love u

    shan 2 Jul at 8:37 am
  5. just enjoy having a nice good and happy birthday with your family

    kathy maganda 3 Sep at 10:27 am
  6. Thanks for ur bd speech i believe thta it wil help me

    Charles mashatola 13 Sep at 11:58 pm
  7. thank u so much .it really halped me out

    sia 6 Mar at 8:12 pm
  8. Tanx it realy help me

    Anonymous 5 May at 11:52 am
    Well so far this is the oldest I’ve ever been ?
    My parents assure me that I still act like a child! YES – Eternal Youth is mine!!!!
    Massive thank you to you all for coming tonight, especially those who’ve traveled far, it means a great deal to me!
    A luau is a gathering of family and friends to enjoy good food, good company, and good times! The atmosphere at a Hawaiian luau is “Hang Loose” which I thought appropriate now that I’m 40 and supposed to be hanging a bit loose myself!
    God has truly blessed me with incredible friends and family:
    Each and every one of you shares a special place in my life. I’ve known some of you longer than others (and amazingly I still gave you an invite.) I want to thank you for the good times we’ve shared and for the ones we’re yet to create!
    Giving someone a lei symbolizes the love, affection, and respect you have for that person. I have some special leis to honour a few people with tonight.
    Mum & Dad, you are inspirations to me. You have helped me so much over the years with your unconditional love and support, allowing me incredible security. The only thing better than having you as my Mum and Dad is my children having you as their Nana and Poppa. The faith and values you’ve instilled in me have blessed my life abundantly. I wouldn’t be who I am today without you, so thank you from the bottom of my heart.
    My sister Carolyn – You bring great joy to my childhood memories and continue to bring me joy today. I know you care for me deeply, you prove this to me time and time again with your actions. I love you and am honoured to have you as my sister.
    My brother Jamie – I have loved you for as long as I can remember and will continue to, till the day I die. Thank you for always being there for me and wanting to protect me.
    My little bro Grant – I love you fiercely. You have the biggest heart and such immense talent. I’m so proud of you.
    My best friend Janice – such incredible times together, we have laughed till it hurts. Rare is a friendship as precious as ours. I love you more than you’ll ever know.
    Aaron – thank you SO much for this party, once again you’ve provided amazingly! You are a dream come true. You’ve filled my life with the most incredible memories and have literally given me the world, by showing me more of it than I ever dreamed possible! And, as if that wasn’t enough, you made my ultimate dream a reality – with our children. I’m deeply in love with you and can’t help loving you!!! XXX
    And finally, the people who made this incredible man: David and Linda – thank you for Aaron, and for loving and treating me as you do your own daughters.

    I hope you’re all having a good time? If you’re not, you’d better start now because I’m not going to wait for you! 😀

    Elizabeth Marriott 26 May at 2:31 am
  10. not so good website

    arun 13 Jul at 3:27 am
  11. Thanks so much for ur speeches.i’ll really help me out on my bday

    Jenny claire 13 Sep at 1:39 am
  12. Hi! I am just trying to get ideas for a speech for my bestfriends 18th birthday?

    Shauna 26 Sep at 2:11 pm
  13. Thanks for the speeches

    bhoj 21 Jun at 5:46 am
  14. …nice speech…it helps me to get idea for constructing my own speech

    zhaina mae 3 Oct at 6:47 am
  15. I thank u coz dis really helped me

    Ashley 9 Apr at 7:34 pm
  16. Thank you this speech it really helped my bro with his bday speech

    Veshala soknanan 22 Apr at 8:31 pm
  17. Hi, I’ve been asked to say a few worlds at my own 30th birthday party. Any help appreciated.

    Ellie 11 May at 1:38 pm
  18. Hi guys plz give me ideas on my speech at my sister’s 21st birthday party

    pearl willie 21 Aug at 11:39 am
  19. ..i will ask permission to you that i will use your speech in our practicum in English subject.. thank you very much.!! 🙂 by the way.. you has a nice and good speech.. 🙂

    Lorie Lyn Espallardo 16 Oct at 10:28 am
  20. Good speeches

    j.b 22 Nov at 4:00 pm
  21. asked to make a vote of thanks at my cousins 50th birthday

    themba 18 Oct at 11:40 am
  22. very pretty~

    GRACE RA 28 Aug at 5:48 pm
  23. ausorel 19 Apr at 11:59 am
  24. marrayl 19 Apr at 1:47 pm
  25. garlbail 19 Apr at 5:22 pm
  26. kimawal 19 Apr at 6:53 pm
  27. pacisanb 19 Apr at 8:41 pm
  28. ikedar 19 Apr at 10:07 pm
  29. akeygar 19 Apr at 11:38 pm
  30. helmari 20 Apr at 1:06 am
  31. feliliz 21 Apr at 5:12 am
  32. fatgen 21 Apr at 7:41 am
  33. baldgor 21 Apr at 2:50 pm
  34. kaecher 21 Apr at 5:10 pm
  35. amadnadi 25 Apr at 4:22 pm
  36. marelg 25 Apr at 6:12 pm
  37. leofar 25 Apr at 7:51 pm
  38. bannafa 25 Apr at 9:30 pm
  39. sadykar 25 Apr at 11:09 pm
  40. fermnich 26 Apr at 4:09 am
  41. ulunaar 5 May at 1:28 am
  42. glegab 5 May at 3:04 am
  43. fifsaxb 5 May at 4:32 am
  44. battlau 5 May at 6:07 am
  45. yamsak 5 May at 7:38 am
  46. browyll 5 May at 9:11 am
  47. ninlang 5 May at 10:44 am
  48. tahream 5 May at 12:16 pm
  49. taawil 5 May at 1:50 pm
  50. taisof 5 May at 3:26 pm
  51. iniinve 5 May at 5:02 pm
  52. wilange 5 May at 6:34 pm
  53. feleve 5 May at 8:08 pm
  54. lorrolwi 5 May at 9:40 pm
  55. katbay 5 May at 11:14 pm
  56. seiwvit 6 May at 12:54 am
  57. walkjane 6 May at 2:27 am
  58. clarfurn 6 May at 4:00 am
  59. yohdagm 6 May at 5:33 am
  60. larvolw 6 May at 7:07 am
  61. nathchay 6 May at 8:40 am
  62. lorsak 8 May at 1:54 am
  63. theosali 8 May at 3:40 am
  64. furnmak 8 May at 7:30 am
  65. jalban 8 May at 9:24 am
  66. marwherr 8 May at 11:11 am
  67. baptjan 8 May at 2:36 pm
  68. taluria 8 May at 6:00 pm
  69. ashpalm 8 May at 8:02 pm
  70. laqwas 8 May at 9:57 pm
  71. darylynd 9 May at 1:52 am
  72. sigvinc 9 May at 5:12 am
  73. kafpana 9 May at 6:50 am
  74. vynyfreb 9 May at 8:29 am
  75. wykegi 9 May at 10:11 am
  76. jarrbar 9 May at 11:53 am
  77. benmarr 9 May at 5:00 pm
  78. dellpro 9 May at 6:38 pm
  79. fidoha 9 May at 11:31 pm
  80. petujam 10 May at 1:11 am
  81. kareuge 11 May at 1:12 am
  82. quabhill 12 May at 3:35 pm
  83. gloest 12 May at 5:16 pm
  84. valajem 12 May at 7:18 pm
  85. valche 12 May at 9:21 pm
  86. jayvwer 12 May at 10:56 pm
  87. gizeelm 13 May at 12:32 am
  88. talfran 13 May at 2:07 am
  89. brunkam 13 May at 5:27 am
  90. orsvail 16 May at 4:24 am
  91. wyleast 16 May at 10:09 am
  92. marzan 16 May at 5:18 pm
  93. nanland 17 May at 12:40 am
  94. fabrlaty 17 May at 1:55 am
  95. sanmar 17 May at 10:06 am
  96. navejan 17 May at 2:54 pm
  97. In other words, the app will override or disable UAC’s security features, so that you are given full access to the programs you wish to copy or simply run.
    While the program is in place, that’s not a difficult process, it is only when you want to remove the hack that you are going to find yourself in trouble. Even though it is fairly easy to see what is going on the first time the program is launched, it is not immediately obvious how to undo the modifications made

    6add127376 valnoel

    valnoel 20 May at 9:34 am
  98. Read the smallest of print, or rather, the smallest of the description, as it will be clear to you soon enough as to what to expect from this cool utility.
    About the program
    DpkGen is a Delphi package generator and converter that allows you to generate Package Files (.dpk) from any template. This application or tool can be used by programmers working on software projects which are based on Delphi programming. This is a command-line utility and is not a graphical

    6add127376 hildbert

    hildbert 20 May at 9:53 am
  99. In addition, it has a few bugs, and you might have to tweak it a few times in order to get things just right.

    You might learn a lot about Cryptography by simply looking the thing up in Wikipedia. You might also figure it out by simply googling “Cryptography”. They work.
    Lets make it a bit less obvious.
    Cryptography is the study of any method, system or process which relies on making secret data unreadable (crypt

    6add127376 shaekat

    shaekat 20 May at 12:38 pm
  100. At the same time, since this is not a paid application, it does come with some limitations for saving icons in bulk. Therefore, you can only save icons in ICO format into the.ico filetype and it has no built-in ability to save any image format.
    The trial version is not a paid application anymore and can only be used for an unlimited amount of time. However, the batch icon extraction feature is disabled.
    IconView Pro is not very obvious when it

    6add127376 wakjana

    wakjana 20 May at 1:04 pm
  101. Polizistin beer

    Polizistin beer is a kind of beer brewed in the town of Brebach am Rhein, Germany, that has become famous throughout the world. It is known for its refreshing bready taste, its darker color due to the dark malt added, and the soft graininess of the malt. It is a typical example of a helles beer; the ale yeast gives it its characteristic strong flavor of Hops and Malt.


    6add127376 daigder

    daigder 20 May at 2:08 pm
  102. After the installation, SensorSeismometer contains the following files:


    The SensorSeismometer1.cs add-in code uses Automation.dll. To use this add-in, SensorSeismometer.exe must be started with Microsoft.

    6add127376 elenchan

    elenchan 20 May at 2:33 pm
  103. As compatible with the various popular audio file types the app can handle, users are able to achieve great results when working with them.
    The app can be downloaded from Softasm.

    So you already know that your cellular data plan can be a costly affair, that’s why cutting back on the usage of the network applications you don’t need, is a smart decision, not forgetting about your operator incentives program.
    Luckily for Android users, they have the Teracopy app

    6add127376 gladche

    gladche 20 May at 3:00 pm
  104. For writing mathematical expressions, the program provides a special editor, offering plenty of various short cuts:
    linear = l i n e
    segment = s e g m e n t
    linear operations short cut = l i n e m o t o r s h o t c h
    integer operations short cut = i n t e n s t m o t o r s h o t c h
    power operations short cut = p o w e r w o r t h

    6add127376 ilyswai

    ilyswai 20 May at 3:28 pm
  105. Mad Productivity Key Features
    • 14 Themes (3 to choose from)
    • Over 50,000 quotes (more to come soon)
    • The Snappy To-Do List
    • Decide exactly how many tasks you want to do
    • More than 43,000 Notes
    • The record of your time and the productiveness every day
    • Add Your Own Quotes
    • Adjust Your Printer’s Color Settings
    • Change the Theme to Black & White
    • Man

    6add127376 eugevlad

    eugevlad 20 May at 3:57 pm
  106. At last, its release! I am very happy for this software. It’s the fastest AIO text convert application, and does translation with ease.
    Scanner support is very helpful. It’s somehow similar to HP Wordjet 3600, but has a lower price. It costs only $191.99, compared to $839.99 for the 3600. The main difference is the price range, which is way lower than the HP’s.
    · Scan

    6add127376 warwak

    warwak 20 May at 4:42 pm
  107. Furthermore, it’s useful to backup entire content of your computer in the form of created user accounts or text messages with FolderSync’s built0in Backup For Folders and SMS functionality. Other interesting features include the ability to automatically copy a folder or file only if it’s changed and the ability to preview files in e.g. Preview Pane (Placer can be configured as default app for opening file previews).

    Automation, FTP, and Sync
    Sync your files between

    6add127376 eldemar

    eldemar 20 May at 5:00 pm