Example of a Best Man’s speech
Here is a funny example of a best man speech that has given by Ryan Marshall
There are probably elements of it that you could use in your own best man speech.
Example of a Best Man’s Speech
Ladies and gentlemen; bride and groom.
May I first say that the bridesmaids are looking absolutely smashing today (winks and points to one in a flirtatious yet funny way), and, only rightly so, second to none to our lovely bride, Lauren. I’m sure you will all agree with me there.
For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Ryan Marshall, a long time friend of Thomas’. I’ve known Tom for 15 years; ever since I blew my nose on his glasses case back in school. Since then, we have had many epic adventures together: from running away from school, running from the police, bar brawls, women and trips around the world. So the time we have spent together means that Tom has, in a way, shaped my sense of humour – so if you find this speech rather unfunny, you can blame him.
So, Tom – my wingman; my partner in crime. After all of our evenings in the pub with Tom chasing women around the pool table with his tongue hanging out in a drunken stupor, he finally found the woman of his dreams. For those who entered the lottery of this magnificent number, and Tom, we all know your lucky number now, 86. So, if you have that raffle ticket there’s a free drink waiting at the bar for you.
But Tom and I have had many memorable experiences together, that even now we still share over a pint:
our days off school, Tom making a cigarette out of a piece of A4 paper, our trip to America and our falls down the ski slopes – too many times we have come close to death. And now I have the honour of sharing the top table with him and standing as his best man. And for that, thanks mate.
Last week I asked Tom what he wanted from the marriage; he said long lasting love and a family, and of course, Lauren. Later that day I asked Lauren the same question. She replied: a toaster and a microwave. You see men – some are easy to please.
But, as I have had my orders from Lauren and Tom not to mention the stag night at String-fellows, I have had no alternative in finding another funny and embarrassing story to share with you.
So here goes:
On our ski trip to America in 2002, Tom and I had to share a bed – so Lauren, I know what you’re going through. Here is the number of my therapist if you need him. But anyway, it was cold and snowy when we arrived. Tom has always been a joker and the first thing he did when we got to our hotel was hide a rubber snake in my bed. It was 3 in the morning when I discovered it, and I nearly fainted. But instead of helping me, Tom sat back with a cup of coffee and laughed until he cried.
Unamused, I plotted revenge. The next night I opened the patio door on our second floor room, and carried him outside whilst he was sleeping. After I had locked the door, I woke him up. He was in nothing but his underpants. I told him that if he didn’t apologise I wouldn’t let him in – being a stubborn 17 year old he refused and chose to climb down the drainpipe instead. Half way down I opened the door and went to watch – the sight was hilarious. Picture this: Tom, 30 feet above the floor in only his underpants and stuck as the ledge beneath him had broken. I couldn’t stop laughing, and had no way of helping him either.
As for him, it got worse. It started to snow. And snow heavy. After a few more minutes of laughter and bombarding him with snowballs, I began to worry. He was turning blue, but me being the brains of our operation, had a plan. I got dressed, went outside and placed a skip under him to cushion his landing. After persuading him, for around 5 minutes, to fall into it, he let go and missed the skip.
He never forgave me for misplacing the skip. Nor, for getting all our other school friends outside to watch him.
Anyway that’s enough embarrassment for him today.
Tom has been a changed man since he met Lauren – not going to the pub so often so that he can spend more time with her. And nowadays he always has the largest smile on his face, one that they both have and I hope will keep for the rest of their lives.
Finally, there are a couple of thank-you’s that I’ve been asked to say.
Firstly, the seating arrangers. There was a method to where you are seated – the gift list. Mentioning no names, but Sue and Barry at the back, thanks for the candles.
Secondly, there are two people who have worked very hard in making tonight possible, so first a round of applause for them. Ladies and gents, the bar staff.
But on a serious note now, a massive thank you to everyone who has contributed and made Tom and Laurens day so wonderful.
Ladies and gentlemen. Please could you all stand and raise your glasses, and join me in wishing them both all the love and happiness a couple can possibly have.
To Thomas and Lauren.
You may also find our article on how how to structure a wedding speech useful. This also contains information on how to structure a best man’s speech.
4 April 2009
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