Advice on my presentation (script somewhat)

[joshcmg]

Hello everyone,

My name is Josh and I have a start up business which focuses on providing free co branded free school supplies to university students. It'll be a collaboration with the institution in distributing the school supplies.

I'll be meeting with the institution management to present to them my company services and product.

I've read up several articles and try to learn as much as possible prior to planning my presentation and in addition SimonR who is a presentation guru from this forum has given me very useful and constructive advice during my planning of presentation.

I'm hoping someone could review my presentation in terms of phrasing, structure and flow etc. I know good presentation shouldn't be scripted as Simon has pointed out before but as I doesn't have a mic on my pc and I did my recording on my cellphone. I written what I've recorded onto a text document instead.

Any kind souls willing to help me out in reviewing my presentation?

Thanks for dropping by!

Kind regards,
Josh

[SimonR]

Josh, I'm so sorry, I owe you an email, don't I!!?? Sorry - all I can say is that life's been manic and I've lost track of things. Could you re-send me the last email you sent me about your presentation and I promise to answer it this week!

Simon

[joshcmg]

Heya Simon!

Yes you OWE me an email! haha just kidding..

You have already helped me tremendously and offered me tons of good advice on my presentation.

I really appreciate you offering to help me again despite your busy schedule, I will send you an email with the presentation asap when I get home!

Thanks Simon, will be in touch with you shortly!

Cheers
Josh